"Im recently divorced and looking for a different but col scene with the right chill guy. I'm 34 white 6ft 200 recently divorced and have a kid. I'm looking for a 19-28 you guy..u can be str8, Bi or Masc non scene gay dude. Just be chill and ale to ost. I want to just put on shorts and thirst and fall asleep together with each other. I just want that feeling of security you get from having a best male bud in your life. I use to share a bed in my dorm w different buds. There were several of us. I always slept like a baby. I want that feeling again. I'd give you $2 a minute for your time and useofmyournplace to chill and nap. Very nice offer. Hit me back "


lol.

Have at me. Here's been the e-mails.


"eah - I have a son and have been on "hold" for like a year and a half with her.

I'm unemployed and seeking work but not easy to find.I was a massage therapist for many years.


I am straight. I will not do anything sexual. I'm a chill dude I'm used to being alone in my man-cave

Willing to give this a shot if you're still looking -- I can't guarantee we will get along. And the most I'd be somewhat ok with is sleeping in the same bed or giving you a massage on my massage table (Not in bed!)

Anyway let me know Im an attractive easy goin 25 y/o guy who will do whatever it takes to keep my child in my life. " -me


"Cool response bud.. Name is ****.. Where are you at and when can you chill? Could I practice my massage techniques on you? Your arrangement is all cool w me just like to do massage sometime and don't know anyone to work on. You wanna send a pig and let's get set up. Hit me back" -him

"Here are a couple pictures of me

I can host, have a roommate but could give 2 profanitys about him to be honest, heh

I just really want to make sure you aren't going to change your story on me last minute or something... Because I've been in a uncomfortable situation where I was just trying to hang out, didn't mind he was gay, and he kept wanting to suck my dick saying he loves straight boys blah blah blah.. Eventually leaving pushing him off of me.

It's just not my thing. I'm as comfortable with my own sexuality as I am with other peoples sexuality: VERY. I feel if I can respect them on that level the respect should be reciprocated, you know??

As long as that is cleared up - then yes you may practice massage techniques on me, as long as we're not talking code, I can even give you some helpful insight as I've been doing massage therapy for 5-6 years now.

Not sure on a exact time as of this moment.

Just be straight up & honest with me, and I think this could work. How often are you hoping to do this? I do have a "GF" right now, that I am basically using for sex & money... What's funny is she feels she is using me. In a way she is, I really am a great guy to be around for people who are in need of healing. I'm just a guy who is down to earth and true to himself, nothing more and certainly nothing less. " -me

"Oh and she knows that's what I'm in it for - just like I know what she's in it for, so don't think I'm scumbagging this chick... But it ain't no $2 a minute that's for sure, when I say I use her for sex & money I just mean every time she comes over, she pays for everything...Right now shes gettin jamba juice because I need to rehydrate from last night! Haha.... So tell me a bit about how you came to this conclusion of yous and what exactly it is you're looking to get out of this? No judgement here, I've experienced and lived through some very bizarre moments in life so believe me brother, secrets, shame or guilt - it's all safe with me. " -me

"Let's do it" -him

This will end well....

 

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You think I'm going to fall asleep? I'll happily fake sleeping for $120 an hour.

 

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And I read that post many times, luckily he means t-shirt and not thirst.

But, creepy - much?

The post is still live so yeah, you can look it up if ya don't believe me


The worst that could happen is the dude wants to cuddle or somethin and if that's the case he's gunna have to work up to that.

lmfao.

And if youve learned one thing of me in all this time, ACF - it is that I am shameless. I do have a conscience, but I am shameless.

i told the wife, i have to get back to the rape thread

 

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so when is it that you're gonna get roofied/raped?

 

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And to be perfectly CLEAR, this wasn't posted in any sort of "personals" section.

This is just a really creepy straight up job offer.

And I'm all over it. Consider me the honey badger of would-be sexual assault. I'd end up raping HIM! Er.. Wait a minute.. That's not what I mean.

Oh, you brought me a half-drunk gatorade? How thoughtful of you. *chug chug chug* Yeah, no.