Hello,

My son is 3 1/2 and is pretty much potty trained for pee but when it comes to poop he is not interested in going in the toilet. At his daycare he went twice and I actually got him to go twice here at home as well. Once about a year ago and then another time just a few months ago.

Every time he has to poop he comes up to me and asks for a diaper. Let's me know when he's finished and I clean him up and put his underwear back on. I was thinking of saying no when he asked for one but I don't want him to get cramps or anything of the sort.

I mentioned to him once this box of diapers would be finished that's it, there are no more. He keeps saying ok and will go on the toilet when they are finished but I'm not so sure. Maybe he will surprise me and actually start going on the toilet but from past experience with him he just will not have anything to do with the toilet when it comes to pooping.

Any advice on how to let him go poop on the toilet or just let him go when he's ready by himself? For his pee, it was exactly on his 3rd birthday he woke up and said I want to go pee on the potty, yes he's had a few mistakes since then but he is 99% on the potty when it comes to pee.

Thanks in advance.

 

-----signature-----

My daughter just told us when she was three that she didn't want to wear diapers anymore and that was it. I assume it's probably harder to train boys, though.

I would just tell him one day that there will be no more diapers tomorrow and then make sure they're gone. Have him go on the potty and don't back down and don't second guess yourself. You might have to clean up a few messes but in the long run, it's worth it to watch your son become a responsible little person.

Silver

 

-----signature-----

I'd say the ultimate answer depends on you and your child. That being said, if he is coming to you every time that he poops, he knows that the poop is there, he doesn't like it on him, and he's ready to poop in the toilet.

Buy him some big boy underwear, get all excited because he's getting so big (let him pick it out!), and explain to him that poop in the underwear isn't acceptable. (Pick whatever you choose, it's nasty, the characters will get dirty, it makes his butt messy, etc. Get the point across somehow.) When he makes a mess, he is more than old enough to clean it up himself. The first couple of times you'll need to help him out so he knows what to do - dump the poop in the toilet, clean the underwear with some soap and water, get clean underwear and put it on. The two times my son had to do this, I had him leave the wet underwear in the tub until I could work it in the next load of laundry. This exact method worked right after my son's third birthday.

Other way is slower and easier to stretch out. Use pull-ups. If you don't do some kind of modification on the above method, however, your child is going to treat them just like a diaper (which it is, obviously), and it's only going to keep costing your checkbook more money.

Since I 'retired' the diapers/pull-ups, I think Brian has had two, maybe three accidents. One was because he was sick and pooped while puking, the other two were because he was having too much fun playing and didn't want to say anything out of fear that we wouldn't let him go back to playing after going to the bathroom (away from home). Both of those times I threw the underwear away - since he really likes his underwear, it only apparently took those two times.

Good luck. It's worth it, I promise.

 

-----signature-----

My son's father threatened him with bodily harm, and POOF he was potty trained. He was also over the 3 mark, so it'll be okay PS - he didn't actually ever get beaten, but the threatening worked lol

 

-----signature-----

My kid was pretty obvious when he was about to go, plus there were usually a couple nasty farts to warn you to pay special attention. We'd ask him if he needed to go and when it was obvious he had to or he actually said yes we'd rush him to the toilet.

We treated wearing underwear like it was a special reward and that seemed to make him keen on it. He's had a couple accidents and didn't like to change the underwear after or be threatened with "little boy pull-ups." I never thought about throwing them out though that would have worked well I'm sure. Plus less of my least favourite cleanup to do.

 

-----signature-----

Thanks for the replies everyone.


He says he doesn't like diapers anymore and that he's not a baby but when it comes to pooping he just has to have one on. He dislikes the diapers so much that at night time he will take it off so I check him often until I go to bed. I sometimes wake up to him sitting in pee. I don't get mad at him for that but try to explain that's why he still needs a diaper most nights because he pees while he's asleep. I don't let him drink too much before bed and get him to go right before he hops into bed for the night.


But I think the route I will take is that once this box is finished, that's it...no more diapers and if he pees while he's asleep I'll just have to do an extra load of washing now and then. I don't like the idea of pull-ups to be honest, they are just like a diaper in my opinion and he can still go in them when I am trying to teach him to go in the toilet/potty. The underwear idea won't work because he already has his big boy underwear and doesn't get too thrilled about a new pair these days, even if I do let him pick them out. However, I will let him do the clean up if mistakes do happen. (or help me at least)


When he does say he has to go, I say let's go on the potty and sit him down but he holds it in, I don't like that, I don't want him to get cramps or not sure if it can harm him in anyway really. He knows this so holds out for the diaper.


So....as I mentioned above there, I will not be buying a new box of diapers once these are finished. Only about 15 or so to go. Wish me luck!

 

-----signature-----

I think once he has to clean up his own messes a couple times he will get the picture pretty quick. As you've said he already knows when he has to go, its just a matter of him deciding to use the toilet.

 

-----signature-----

maybe see why he doesn't like to poop on the potty.


Might be something as simple as he doesn't like the water splashing on his lil butt. I had a niece that didn't like that.

 

-----signature-----

I can't even imagine LETTING my 2-4 year old clean up any mess to do with pee or poop, quite honestly.

 

-----signature-----

Agreed.

I make mine stand there while I do the cleanup though, and if he messed on clothing new clothes are last. Chilly bits are an incentive to do better next time IMO.

 

-----signature-----