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Author Topic: OT: Men's Rules [Locked]
Wicked_Taz
Posts: 30
Registered: 2003-3-22 01:15:42
The Men's rules

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.


These are OUR rules:

Please note… these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!


1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don’t try to change that.


1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.


1. Saturday = sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.


1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.


1. Crying is blackmail.


1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:


* Subtle hints do not work!

* Strong hints do not work!

* Obvious hints do not work!

* JUST SAY IT!


1. ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question


1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for


1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days


1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us


1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one


1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.


1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.


1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.


1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.


1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, Really


1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as:


* Sex,

* Sport,

* Cars,

* or Computers


1. You have enough clothes.


1. You have too many shoes.


1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.


1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don’t mind that, it’s like camping


 

-----signature-----
Wicked Taz -Officer of the SunWalkers - Asheron's--WE
Madrox da tinker 250+ spec at/wt/mit /38% imbue
Madrox da mage /Madrox Reborn / Super Taz
LOTRO-Brandywine: Malrondis/Supertaz/Tarrondis
The_Original_Airmail  1 star
Title: The Über Spearman
Posts: 209
Registered: 2002-12-10 12:10:13
lol nice list.

 

-----signature-----
Airmail: Level 275 Über Spearman...I beat AC without plug-ins or macroing August 1/08
Anirbas: Level 275 Bow
Azzkickr: Level 275 Mage
I Toss Stuff: Level 275 Thrown Weapon/Tinkerer
I r teh mule k: Level 30 Trade Bot
SplashofPink  2 stars
Title: Pretty In Pink
Posts: 293
Registered: 2006-6-3 18:27:00
So is Airmail hope he enjoys the sofa....

 

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I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees. I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues. And I'm asking you sir, at the top of my lungs - that thing! That horrible thing that I see! What's that thing you've made out of my truffula tree?
Xenpor_VN  1 star
Posts: 104
Registered:
Excellent list.

Definitely agree with the headache one lol!
bruce_the_darkknight
Title: Legends Quest Master
Posts: 49
Registered: 2003-2-16 09:42:59
I vote Taz for President


Great List!!!

 

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Legends http://legends.rbcb.net
Cyns tells you, "I was running around in just a shirt on viss today "
Mursili says, "lol... I paid his rent... he's my neighbor.. I feel like his sugar mama"
Wanobe_WE  1 star
Posts: 164
Registered: 2004-3-25 18:43:13
Wicked_Taz posted:

1. Saturday = sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.



Pfft Sunday is the only day that matters when it comes to sports!
The_Original_Airmail  1 star
Title: The Über Spearman
Posts: 209
Registered: 2002-12-10 12:10:13
The sofa thing is true, I have a nice leather reclining sofa, its sofa king comfortable.

 

-----signature-----
Airmail: Level 275 Über Spearman...I beat AC without plug-ins or macroing August 1/08
Anirbas: Level 275 Bow
Azzkickr: Level 275 Mage
I Toss Stuff: Level 275 Thrown Weapon/Tinkerer
I r teh mule k: Level 30 Trade Bot
Lite-Nomad
Title: Lord of the Sword
Posts: 23
Registered: 2003-3-2 16:58:43
howdy

 

-----signature-----
Lite Nomad/Sword/Monarch/El Conquistador
Boldness be my friend! Arm me, audacity!
*In Memory of my friend Kc*
Love Slave to the Gypsy Princess
http://www.clanofthenomads.com -- www.werfedup.com
Lite-Nomad
Title: Lord of the Sword
Posts: 23
Registered: 2003-3-2 16:58:43
Hey Taz...long time bud. Be sending you a message as soon as i get 20 posts in (3).

 

-----signature-----
Lite Nomad/Sword/Monarch/El Conquistador
Boldness be my friend! Arm me, audacity!
*In Memory of my friend Kc*
Love Slave to the Gypsy Princess
http://www.clanofthenomads.com -- www.werfedup.com

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